Helping Hands

Helping Hands

 

This was another story half written a while back , I thought I would finish and post it one go — a bit of a read – let me know what you think 

Thanks 

Helping hands her own little agency, Was exactly what the name stated helping hands she turned her hand to any task that needed to be done by anyone.

You have a problem, you need help, give helping hands A call. That was the logo of the company, her company. 

Khushi , Has launched Her business about eight years ago and it had grown from strength to strength. She was a successful business women. She had made her mark in the business world. She had made enough money so that she would never have to work again should she choose to do so. She was almost in the same league as the Gupta’s   and the Raizada’s.

She had money, position, security , friends, a son who was gem and yet there was still a hole in her life. A void -she had loved and lost.

What she had lost was more than she could bear to think about. Her father, mother, bua, sister, nephew and niece could now be added to that list. Arnav’s name was not on that list as you could not lose , something you never had.

Arav ran up to her and hugged her.

“What ‘s up mum ?”

“Nothing”

“Not nothing” As Arav raised a finger to her eye and wiped a tear.

He showed Kushi her tear on his finger. “Thats’s not nothing – you thinking about your mum and dad ? Mum, the way I see it you can be sad and miss them or we can do something about it, it’s summer holidays we can go back to India and see them over summer break.”

” It’s not that simple Arav”

“It is – You left years ago and  you guys have not spoken because of me – I get it, I have no dad, I get that too- I don’t mind – You say to me  drive you round the bend and sometimes you get awfuly cross and horrible and your nose becomes twice the size “

“It does not Arav”

“It does and changes colour , you should see it from my view, but I’m losing the point – we can go we can see them; they can shout  and scream like you, at you but mum they won’t stay long for mad – you never do when I have been a tiny bit naughty “

“Arav … its not that easy “

“yes it is” – and if they don’t – how bad could it be, remembering the last time his mum had got really mad at him he had shaved Oscars legs to see if he could change him into a poodle.

“You , didn’t even last half a day being really mad at me”

The seed was planted …. Khushi had spent a long time now abroad in the states and she wanted to go home ….. see her parents they would be furious, hurt, mad, angry – they would all have to traverse the myriad of emotions before forgiveness and acceptance of her and Arav.  How much had she missed of their lives  how much had they missed of her life … Arav … her success.. and her failures … they would have shared all of it but to date she had only allowed them to share in her failure….. was it really failure …. failure from their view point , disapointment ,hurt  and grief…. she had not given her family an opportunity to allow them to overcome that. 

her thoughts then and now were very different …at the time she was scared, young , pregnant and single…now she was a parent and older and more experienced  …how differently would she have handled that last meeting with her parents if she she could go back and replay that that scene. It was etched in her mind forever – it never changed, or faded, it was not a black and white image fading at the edges .it was their in bright bold full colour  – it was in her mind  and it was as though it happened yesterday 

The seed was planted …. Khushi had spent a long time now abroad in the states and she wanted to go home …. see her parents they would be furious, hurt, mad, angry – they would all have to traverse the myriad of emotions before forgiveness and acceptance of her and Aarav.  How much had she missed of their lives how much had they missed of her life … Aarav … her success… and her failures … they would have shared all of it but to date she had only allowed them to share in her failure…. was it really failure …. failure from their view point, disappointment ,hurt  and grief…. she had not given her family an opportunity to allow them to overcome that. 

Her thoughts then and now were very different …at the time she was scared, young, pregnant, and single…now she was a parent and older and more experienced…how differently would she have handled that last meeting with her parents, if she could go back and replay that scene. It was etched in her mind forever – it never changed, or faded, it was not a black and white image, fading at the edges. It was there in bright bold full colour – it was in her mind and it was as though it happened yesterday.

What was the worst that could happen if she listened to Aarav, she would returned home, build a few bridges, not everyone would forgive her but then again not everyone would remain angry. She reran her last encounter with her parents and family in her mind… she had survived the last fall out and she would again if need be … yes it might be painful but this time she was more experienced and she had Aarav she would survive. There was so much to gain and so little to lose. She ran scenarios of the possible outcomes of a repeat meeting and every which way she played it out it was never as bad as history had recorded. With that in mind, decision made she was going back to Delhi and Lucknow and try and meet her family and repair broken bonds. Had she severed them or had her family … now when Khushi looked back she couldn’t define who had … events had taken place, words said, actions taken and then nothing. Neither side had had opportunity to sit and talk – She had certainly not made any effort to re contact her family because it had been so painful breaking away and then time stepped in and had just ticked away …and now almost 9 years on she was revaluating herself, her life.

She had kept tabs on everyone, every individual throughout the last 9 years now it was time to repair and heal those relationships.

Payal was the weakest link and that’s where she would start…

“Wow! mum this is a fantastic house – is it really ours? or just for the summer holidays?”

It’s ours … I have decided no more running away we can have two homes one in the states and one here. Then you will always have somewhere to come back to when we want to. If things work out its not far from your cousins house and you guys can meet up and play.”

Khushi had picked a location, not far from Shantivan but far enough away to hide but close enough to walk to if required.

She had sent Payal a message to meet for lunch at the Comfy Corner – she had made the invitation very simple and clear.

It’s been a long time, I’ve missed my sister at every turn, I have never forgotten I think its time to heal and move forward, I can’t change my past but I can change my future.

I hope you will be able to be a part of it …. You don’t have to declare it to the world I can be your best kept secret … I hope you will meet me…. Sorry and Love Khushi.

There had been exchanges of emails -very carefully worded on both sides and now finally a face to face.

Khushi had tried on about ten outfits and they were strewn across the room …

“Mum stop! Enough!.. This outfit is fine, you will look peng.”

“Kya?”

“peng mum peng it means lovely, beautiful”

“Aarav, you don’t understand this is a really important ..”

Aarav cut his mother off.

“Mum! If you don’t get dressed there won’t be anything ..your meeting will have vanished you will still be here thinking… I mean how mum? How can you be so good at work and here you can’t even dress yourself or get yourself to a meeting… I mean … I’m the child and you’re the parent and here I am dressing you and trying to make sure you at least get to the meeting … If you mess up there that’s on you but take this and go change”

Khushi sat at the Comfy Corner in a private seating area shaded from the sun overlooking the pond, she was an hour early; she hadn’t been able to eat anything since yesterday.

She had ordered a drink but not touched it, and she had been twisting the corner of her dupatta until the little pom pom had come off and now the gota was coming undone at that area.

Then she saw her … Payal still the same slightly plumper but essentially the same walking towards her.

Payal and Khushi looked at each other … Khushi big welcome speech evaporated, and silence followed …Khushi was speechless for the first time in her life. Silence ensued both were frozen in time, memories of their last meeting resurfacing. Both stared at each other unable to move or say anything tll the waiter appeared “Would you like to order more drinks?”

This mobilised both girls into action “tea please” in unison.

4 cups of tea later “Only you Khushi can drink 4 cups of tea and have nothing to say”

“Payal I have missed you” and that’s all it took for the dam of emotion to break.

Both were hugging and tears flowed freely for a long while.

Payal updated Khushi on her life … she had married Akaash had three children two boys 5 and 3, Ahaan and Aadi and a girl just under a year her name was Akashya. She was married and lived with the family, Dadi, and Akaash’s parents and Akaash’s elder brother Arnav. Akaash knew she was meeting Khushi today and they had decided not to tell any of the family.

“Khushi smiled …that’s OK I met you and that’s more than enough for me”

“No Khushi, a lot of things were said and they can’t be unsaid, but Akaash and I have decided that it’s time to move on- here” and with that she hand Khushi a envelop.

Khushi hands were trembling as she opened the envelope – an invitation to Akashya Khushi Singh-Raizada’s first birthday party at Shantivan at 4 :00 pm and the invite was for as many as you would like to bring.

More tears flowed …”Khushi ab bus bi karo. The past we will talk about in time ….you left and you never came back, you never even glanced back at me to ask how I felt about everything. I have always had your side in all of this and always will. Now tell me more about you – no one knows anything much about you – what happened?  What have you done in the last 9 years …. Do you…. have a child?”

And with that she Khushi smiled….. “Aarav 8 years old very old for his age and far too serious ……. I never wanted my decisions to have an impact on your life – I wanted you to be able to marry whomever you wished to without having me as a stain on your reputation – so I left and went very far away”

“Khushi where are you staying… am I allowed to meet Aarav …. He is my nephew, your son?

“Payal, I’m not married and have no one on the horizon is that going to be a problem?”

“Not for me and Aakash or my children…. Dadi doesn’t say much about you .. she knows you exist, she’s aware the cloud you disappeared under and she knows me – my relationship with you will not have any repercussions’ for me and if they do Aakash said he will deal with it including his mother. Arnav doesn’t really get involved in family business unless someone says anything to upset us and then he deals with them with an iron rod.  Buaji, Mum and dad are going to be the ones to contend with especially Bua ji and I think Dad – but even then Khushi when you’re name has come up in conversation and recently it has when naming Akashya … I think there was only regret and what if’s. I think one step at a time but the doors that were slammed in your face will open very easily it’s only going to take you to knock. By the way are you ever going to introduce me to my nephew ”

And with that discussion flowed about Aarav.

It was a long time later after several missed calls that Khushi and Payal left.

The next morning at Khushi’s house breakfast was set for three … Khushi, Payal and Aarav.

The doorbell rang and Aarav opened it and saw a pretty lady in a sari standing there twisting the corner of her sari.

“Namaste, Oh god, I thought mum was bad but stop! You’re going to break that corner of the sari…. You have to be my masi – have you and mum got shares in tissue industry”

Payal had tears running down her face when she saw Aarav – how  much had she missed – this was her nephew and he had an uncanny resemblance to her boys.

“Stop” as Payal took a step towards Aarav…. “You can hug me if you want to but don’t pull my cheeks and please stop crying …. I’ve had mum doing it since yesterday.”

Soon the three all sat round the table having breakfast, Khushi and Payal had aloo Puri and tea while Aarav had toast and orange juice.

“ You know its uncanny my boys have toast and orange juice, they hate aloo puri, while me and Akaash love it.”

It was lunch time before Payal left.

“ somum, that’s one down three more to go…. Who is next on your list…. Divide and conquer”

“Mum”

Over the next week Payal became a regular visitor at breakfast time and had started bring her children over.

Payal had gently broken the news in secret to her mum that Khushi was back in town with Arav. She shared stories and pictures of Aarav with their mother mum, breaking down her resistance.

Khushi had originally said mum but then revaluated her decision- mum and dad had to be together and Buaji would follow behind.

With that in mind she emailed her father –

“Babuji, its Khushi, it’s been a long time- I am sorry for what happened in the past, I am sorry how I left, I am sorry that I never contacted you until now, I am sorry about countless things but the one decision I am not sorry about is my son Aarav. We come as a package deal. I would like to come home, I would like him to meet his grandparents and build memories for him to cherish when we are no longer with him. If you are willing to take a step , I will come running .”

All Khushi father said “Finally my daughter and grandchild are coming home when are you arriving ?”

Aarav saw his mother staring at the computer screen crying.

“Ok what gives mum, more tears …. I think we need to go back…. I have never seen you cry so much as now  since we have been in India.

“ My Babuji wants to meet me and you”

Khushi made an appointment to meet her father at Gupta industries head office her father in turn cleared his diary ready to meet his daughter.

With trepidation she arrived at head office presenting her self … KKG to meet with CEO Shashi Gupta at 2:00pm

She was dressed in a clean-cut cream Dior business suit with heels to match.

She knew her way round this office well but waited for instruction. As Khushi entered the lift the penthouse office heads turned.

Who was she? She was beautiful and oozed power and confidence.

As she arrived at the top floor her confidence had ebbed away and all that was left was a scared young girl about to meet her father after a very long time.

She left the lift after being reminded by the lift attendant that this was her floor and she was expected. Khushi arrived at the outer office let herself in and saw a familiar face

“Khushi go through your fathers expecting you”

“Sushma Aunty nice to see you” her dads PA had not changed in all these years.

Khushi entered her father’s office and saw him standing waiting at the window.

Both looked at each other – he was a lot older, his hair was now thinning and completely white, he looked gaunt around the eyes, more wrinkles or more Khushi lines as he used to call them but his eye were the same filled with remorse regret and brimming with tears.

She had walked into his office not knowing what to expect – but not this and in that instant everything was forgotten… her last meeting ….his words …his actions …. She held up her hand to her face she stilled remembered his slap, the sound it made as it contacted with her face, she could still feel the stinging on her face, the hurt and disappointment in his eyes at her news.

They were both immobilised staring at each other, a few feet apart but that distance seemed like miles and then in a split second the distance was traversed and Khushi was in her fathers arms. She could feel his tears as they spilt out and fell on her and she sobbed into his shirt.

Father and daughter stood silently for a long time holding each other let the regret of the last 9 years wash away.

“Ba… ba.  .. hic …buji….. sss …..oo….rrryyyy” was all she could manage.

“We need a drink and I don’t mean tea.. Khushi bitia…”

Shashi walked with Khushi to the sofa poured a drink for each of them .

He  took his in one swig ….how long had he been waiting for her and he knew the first step had to come from her. He had prepared everything for this moment it had been 9 years coming and still when it happened he couldn’t say any of the things that he wished or planned.

It was a long time later that Shashi spoke.

“Khushi, I’m so sorry ….”

“You let me go when I needed you the most..”

“You left … you never gave me a chance…”

“You should have never let me go…”

“I never let you go Khushi … I just let you grow…”

“YOU never once said stop Khushi don’t go…”

Shashi smiled and took hold of Khushi hand “You had decided to have Aarav”

“You know my son’s name” Khushi interjected accusingly.

Shashi smiled “ You were my baby, hardly out of nappies yourself, setting of to have a baby by herself come hell or highwater and being a single parent is not easy at the best of times. Garima and I were not about to let you try and do this all by yourself; Khushi we had to let you go, grow, live and come back to us of your own free will when you were ready.We were  never far away, we were your shadow stepping in when you needed support. Now don’t go getting mad a lot of time has passed”

Realisation was dawning on Khushi “did you fund me to get me to the states”

Shashi realised that the only way they could all move forward was for him to come clean –

“Yes, I arranged the visa, your accommodation and helped finance your ideas. Khushi your ideas, not mine, you made it work, not me – it’s been your achievement, not mine. I have watched Aarav grow and so many times I have wanted to say to people that’s my grandson, my Khushi son, but I have never spoken to him, me and Garima have always kept our distance from him until you made the first move.”

Khushi cried even more “all this time I thought I was alone, I never really was. How could I be with a father like you.”

“Khushi that last meeting ..”

“Stop Babuji”

“We were both upset things were said and I don’t blame you but it took a really long time to understand and accept what happened- only when I had my own child then I could begin to comprehend your feelings – It can’t have been easy for you either”

Khushi couldn’t believe that all this time when she thought she’d been along she’d actually had both parents by her side. Then Shashi asked the million-dollar question, he’d asked that night and now he was asking again “who is Aarav’s father? Does he even know of Aarav’s existence?”

A much more mature, secure, less anxious and nervous Khushi replayed her conversation in her brain in the cold light of day “Arnav we need to talk ….. Arnav why haven’t you answered any of my calls….Arnav are you avoiding me …. Arnav please call”

She had called and messaged him he hadn’t responded; he hadn’t replied; all she had back for three weeks was silence. She had never actually told him her news. She had never shared her feelings for her unborn child. She had never voiced her feelings …there was life inside her and she had no option but to give birth and face what ever came with that decision.

She would face it alone if need be or share it with him. But Arnav had made his decision by replying in silence.And then Khushi had made hers – the baby was hers and she would face her family.

She still remembered the shock and disappointment in her parents eyes….her mothers words were the most heart felt of allthat she listened to that day ….total silence. Her mother had not felt enough or cared enough about Khushi to have an opininion about the situation at least her father responded and Buaji was the most vocal of all. An argument erupted with her father slapping her for the first time in his life -now she realised out of disappointment and frustration not anger.

Buaji told her to leave before she destroyed not only her life but Payal’s; and that was the reason she left in the early hours of the morning with a suitcase before anyone else could add anything else to the fire and went to her best friends house booked a plane ticket to Canada and was gone the rest was history.

“No Babuji , he doesn’t know …… he didn’t want to know….. and now he has no right to know ………Aarav is mine….. and mine alone. If Aarav wants to know who is father is …I will tell him when he’s older….the topic of Aarav’s parentage is a closed topic.”

Babuji thought small steps for now, but that topic was certainly not closed.

“Shall we go Khushi, pick up your mum and then introduce me, I should say, us to our grandson.”

Khushi and Aarav spent the next two weeks getting to know the family and loving it. Aarav had everyone wrapped around his little finger running at his beck and call.

His cousins loved playing basketball, come to that any ball game with him and Akashya just liked crawling up to him curling up and sleeping on him.

Aarav loved his new found family – they were all mad like his mum but he loved them. Khushi had met everybody except Arnav he’d been busy away on business but said he would be back for Akashya’s  first birthday.

Akashya’s first birthday party was a grand affair, evening dinner all family and friends and children.

Khushi was aware that Arnav would be there but hadn’t run into him as yet. Even so many years on she could hear the whispers behind her back yes that’s the one that ran away-not married -has a child – was taking drugs -bad girl- not at all like Payal. Khushi had heard it all before, in the States people didn’t care; life was fast and you had to make it work – if you were good at your job and made money people accepted you as they found you. That’s what she had liked about the States the anonymity and acceptance of her situation Aarav had no cross to bear as she was a single mother.

Here it seemed as though society was caught up in it’s own time warp, they had its own set of values here she was Shashi Gupta’s runaway daughter single and with a child in tow- his money and position would open the doors and make her accepted but not enough to stop their tongues and comments.

Khushi and Aarav had grown a second skin to these barbs, and she knew exactly how to return them in her own environment but here she was in her sister’s house – here she couldn’t return the comments just listen and ignore and stay silent.

She checked on Aarav and made sure he was not having to contend with anything – He was doing fine playing with his cousins and a group of children.

She never understood why people had such huge first birthday parties for children as it was a complete adult affair. She remembered Aarav’s first birthday she had a cup cake with one candle, she walked to the park and had a picnic they played on the swings and fed the ducks and had a ride on a llama in the park.

Khushi grabbed herself a cup of tea and took herself of to a secluded part of the house to have time away from the crowds of busy bodies. She liked the calmness of the water, the greenery of the plants and the peace that the poolside provided.   

“Hello Khushi … I was wondering when we would run into each other”

“Hi Arnav”

Arnav knew that Khushi was back in town, after leaving home nine years ago; he had done his upmost to avoid her, he had organised away business trips and scheduled meetings so he wouldn’t have to at home when she was likely to be there. But he knew it was inevitable Akashya’s first birthday a big party – she was going to be there and he was going to have to meet her face to face. The last time he had seen her was over nine years ago and he remembered every second of it. The memory was etched in his mind vivid and alive he had not forgotten even if she had after all this time.

Khushi thought to herself, he’s older, more muscular than she remembered, it looked good on him; he was still eye candy back then and now.

Both individuals stared each other Erie silence followed both didn’t know what to say to the other after their initial greeting and when they did they both started simultaneously.

“How have you been?”

“Are you staying for long in India?”

“No you first” said Khushi

“Fine, Are you staying long?”

“ Aa.. Aa..Aarav’s Summer Holidays”

“ Enjoy …. Excuse me I have to get back”

Both curtly nodded and parted company. Khushi really needed to sit down and drink her tea her heart was pounding in the chest as though it had done a marathon while her legs felt like jelly. Khushi had rehearsed her first meeting with Arnav a thousand  times over in her head and never once had any of the scenarios played out like what had just happened. She had barely got a word out…. Her who could talk for India could barely put two words together.

He hadn’t even made any effort to continue the conversation with any form of niceties; he had replied with the bare minimum of effort as though it was too much effort for him to speak to her. He really didn’t want to have anything to do with her. Well his Answers confirmed now more than history that Arnav wanted nothing to do with her. If and when Aarav wanted to know about his father she would tell him but until that day arrived she never would.

Over the next two weeks Aarav and Khushi became frequent visitors at Shantivan with Aarav spending an increasing amount of their time there, and Khushi joining her father at Gupta Industries head office.

Babuji was surprised at her discipline and work ethic, she was running her business from Dehli and running it quite well not only was she doing that but there was occasion when she sat in on his meetings and he saw another whole side of her ….one that might have never developed if it hadn’t been for her life experiences …he had thought she would get married cook and have kids and be a perfect housewife and soul mate for someone with a lot of patience and money – she had no idea how money worked and what people were like when she left home 9 years ago. Now this Khushi predicted, calculated and made business decisions while her father was still weighing things up in his mind, she came with an idea and placed it Infront of her adversaries and gave them a time frame in which to consider her proposal, she rebuffed their suggestions and place her own instead and end result was a business deal where Gupta Industries had suddenly increased their profit margin by 48%. Not a small sum when the zero’s were added.

Over the next two weeks Babuji took Khushi first and then to all his business meetings where negotiations were underway -Khushi had a knack with negotiations and numbers – people smiled at her and thought of her as another rich man daughter pretending to play shop and by the end of the meeting they had a new level of respect for her. She was no longer the girl who had run away from home and returned unmarried with a child in tow but she was actually a nice person, which was rare in the business world, who was sharper than her father and stung you, you without realising let you make some money while she made a lot more for her company.

In the business corridors whispers had grown to such volume, that everyone knew that Khushi was going to be a bigger force to reckon with than her father, her father was grooming her to take over Gupta Industries as CEO while he took a back seat and retired.

The reality was her father hadn’t even thought about it – he just never had given the idea any thought as he grew to rediscover Khushi he was finding her strengths and weakness and what she was good at was negotiating, calculating and finding her opponents weaknesses and making it her strength. She had an eye for colour and design, but they were not as strong. That’s why Helping Hands had become so big in the states.

He realised it was time to bring Khushi back home, and he had to let her think it was her decision and then there was Aarav to consider – he was a good boy but in all essence he was American- was it fair to take him from everything he knows to a whole new way of living.

It was time Khushi found herself someone who would accept Aarav  and her. Nine years she had lived without anyone in her life that was long enough to get over someone and for the right reasons Aarav and her family, he was sure she would consider moving back.

Of all the possible suitors he thought about Arnav was the best person – in spite of tough exterior and bad temper and razor-sharp business sense, he had seen him with the children and Payal – he was a completely different person. He had the temperament to take on another man’s child as his own. She would move into a house with her sister and her family – that was it He was the perfect candidate. Now all he had to do was introduce them and let them spend time with each other and he was sure the rest he could manage with gentle persuasion – Aarav was the key for Khushi to stay … she would always do what’s best for him. Arnav’s weak point was pretty girls – he had seen quite a few on his arm but no serious relationships. Nani and Di were his weak points – Khushi was pretty the difference was that she was intelligent -he would enjoy sparring with her so really it would be if Nani and Di would accept Aarav and from what he had seen they had already formed a relationship so that hurdle was almost sorted – no the main problems were trying to convince Aarav to move here, And Khushi and Arnav to accept each other.

“Khushi, I can’t make it to this meeting a small company going under a clothing, manufacturing, design company – take my place tomorrow see what’s on the table worth our time and investment or is it a simple take over strip the company of its assets and get rid of the rubbish or not worth our time and money.”

“Yes, sure Babuji time and place and where’s the updated file on the company and accounts”

“It’s a joint venture with ASR designs, so get the file of him tonight and go with him in the morning to the meeting as you will be leaving Aarav there anyway”

“ ASR ??? you mean Arnav ? What Babuji ? You sure I cant take the meeting here, and you go with Arnav ?”

“No Khushi, I can’t – if you can’t do the ASR meeting, I will have to cancel it and reschedule it or lose the business all together.

“Babuji why do you take so much on? I’ll go don’t worry.”

Khushi waited at Shantivan until Arnav arrived home.

“Hi Arnav, I was waiting for I need to pick up the files for tomorrow’s meetings and what time are you going in the morning; I’ll make sure everything is ready for the meeting.”

“What Khushi? Babuji asked you to read the file for tomorrows meeting? But why? I’ve read it, and already sent him the proposal, why do you want to read it?”

“I don’t want to read it; I have been told to read it”

“Ok sure, but it’s not down your thing, there’s no music or cooking in that folder, its basic accounts and analysis in there ….you sure you want to read it, you never used to read anything before except comics Archie and Phantom from what I remember ”

“May I have the files, please……….Thankyou”

Having got the files, she grabbed Aarav’s hand and said her bye’s. Khushi spent most of the night reading, analysing, restricting departments when she saw who their designers were and what their designs looked like. This could be the gem in ASR and Gupta Industries – the designers and infrastructure was there, designs needed to be tweaked to make them more affordable for production, This could be a workable project without cannibalising the whole company – yes they had to get rid of a few staff but the percentage profit was there to be made it needed a cash injection and then would be sustainable as long as the designs were tweaked for the current market price point.

It was 5am by the time the analysis was completed she could get two hours sleep and then waltz her way over to Shativan. She thought to herself I’ll do the meeting and then have a nap.

“Sorry I’m a little late, what time are we leaving ?Arnav?”

“You’re seriously not coming are …. uncle mentioned something, I thought he was joking”

“I’ve read the documents, I can manage more than a comic these days, I can read write and add now I’ve made it to big school, I actually play with the big boys now”

“I’m sure you do; Aarav is a testament to that” he whispered quietly so that only she could hear it

Khushi looked up sharply what did he mean by that.

She watched as Aarav and Arnav had breakfast, each mirroring the other how they applied the butter, bit into their toast and drank their juice. Khushi was unsettled by the uncanny resemblance between father and son. Mamiji and Nani and Di all commented how similar Aarav’s habits were to Arnav’s. Less than 4 weeks left and then she would be back home.

Home? She had been questioning that term, where was home for her and Aarav …. Here he had family and grandparents, there he had childcare but that was all he knew …could Aarav manage the change and now the similarities would it not be better if they were kept apart.

“Well, if you are coming then we had better go and discuss strategy before the meeting. The strategy is simple I’ll talk, and there will be silence from you, that used to be a hard concept to follow, how about now?”

“What the…just like that ….you are not even going to discuss my findings and analysis, I’m not invisible you know, I exist , I have a voice and an opinion, and you can hear it on the way or in the meeting but I will be heard and listened to MR ARNAV SINGH RAIZADA, I’m good, bloody good at what I do, I run a multi-million dollar business, that I set up from scratch, by myself (but that part was looking doubtful since her fathers’ revelations but she didn’t know that at the time and he didn’t need to know that either) with a child in tow. I’m not just a pretty face, with her head in the clouds filled with dreams, who will believe everything that someone tells them. I am KHUSHI KUMARI GUPTA, and you WILL do me the courtesy of shutting up.”

There was pin drop silence at the table, everyone was stunned into shocked immobility – watching the battle between Arnav and Khushi. No one had ever spoken to Arnav like this and survived, in fact no one had ever spoken to Arnav like this at all. They had never realised that Arnav had an opinion about Khushi.

Arnav opened his mouth to start speaking when he felt his sleeve being pulled.

“What the….”

“Give in while your ahead, I’ve not often seen mum this mad ….you won’t win … accept  your punishment like a man” speaking from the voice of experience.

The rest of the members at the breakfast table stifled their laughter. Aarav had diffused the situation in innocence that only existed in children.

Arnav had never seen Khushi this angry, what multi-million-dollar business, there was a lot of information to process hidden behind what she had said, and that to with anger-he would analyse that later. Arnav realised that since he last saw Khushi and realised that she had left the country, and that she was not coming back, he had purposefully sieved all the information that about her, he had not read anything about her, or asked any family member, especially Payal, about her, in fact he had built an impenetrable wall around himself when it came to her. She no longer existed for him and he had survived the fallout from Khushi and here she was back forcing herself back into his life.

“Shall we go and we can discuss your findings?”

With that they both left but not without Khushi getting up and kissing Aarav on the cheek … “See you later and be good for your masi, no fussing about food, just eat what’s cooked for everyone. Not like someone I know”

The rest of the table were now really finding hard to control their laughter – someone had told Arnav Singh Raizada to shut up, he had got something wrong and the comment about food was directed at him”

“Car Khushi”

As soon as they had left Aarav spoke up “I wonder what bit my mum first thing in the morning, it takes her a lot to get that mad, Arnav Uncle is really nice, I wonder what he did to mum to make her that mad?” in his next breath as only children can his statement was forgotten only left echoing with the adults. “Let’s go play” he said to his cousins and then all the kids were gone except Akashya who was still eating up in her high chair.

In the evening when Arnav and Khushi returned …

Aarnav ran up to hug his mum and then looked up to Arnav “Hey Uncle what’s the weather like?”

Arnav looked at Aarav confused “How’s it going little man ? the weather ?”

Aarnav pointed to his mum as Khushi waltzed into the kitchen she was starving, angry, furious and she wasn’t even sure in which order.

Arnav looked over to the kitchen Man you’ve screwed up big time uncle, the weathers not only hot but explosion hot – mum’s making jelabi’s”

All Arnav  could do was look and say the meeting went well – I don’t know why she’s in a mood sitting down. Aarav quickly clapped his mouth over Arnav’s mouth trying to silence him.

“Dude she’s my mum she will hear you from in there… you are going to be made into mince when she’s finished with you; I’m trying to save your skin”

The other members sitting around were bursting with laughter watching the drama play out – Payal remembered Khushi’s Jelabi making. Aarav trying to warn Arnav of the coming storm.

And then a series of events happened all simultaneously, Shashi walked in asking Arnav how the meeting went?

Khushi walked out with a plate of jelabi munching on one.

“That bad” said Shashi nodding over at the jelabi plate

“How dare you say I going to walk away from a project on a whim and leave things unfinished”

With that she gave the plate of jelabi’s to hold slapped Arnav across his face with rage and frustration of the last 9 years – she never walked away from anything, and she was literally left holding the baby.

She took the plate back from Arnav’s hand grabbed Aarav’s “We are going home”

And with that she swept out of the room leaving a stunned Arnav and everyone watching ….

“What exactly happened at the meeting today?” Shashi uncle asked.

All Arnav could reply was “what the …”

“Arnav ji what happened today?” that seemed to be the echoing question around the room.

Shashi looked at Arnav, “I have only ever seen Khushi that upset or that angry that she lost control and that was the night she told us that she was expecting Aarav – so what exactly happened at this meeting?”

Arnav was quick to reply to Shashi … Meeting went fine, there is a new plan on board. I’ll explain details later right now I have to go after Khushi and sort this mess out and with that Arnav was gone.

“Payal exactly how well do Arnav and Khushi know each other ?”

“Babuji, I think this is the most time they have spent together is today”

“Akash, Anjali anyone …. How well do Khushi and Arnav know each other? And I’m not talking about now I’m talking 9 years ago”

Blank faces looked at each other all to scared to delve under the surface of that question. They had all been family friends for a very long time, the relationship had grown stronger and closer since Payal’s marriage.

Payal what do you remember about what Khushi told us about Aarav’s father – Devyani was listening ….

“Shashi …you cannot be thinking to suggest what I think you might be suggesting”

“Devyani, Khushi told us nothing about Aarav’s father and will not tell us anything ….all she said what was the point in destroying two households instead of one”

Payal added “I would be destroying my own family ….and I would never let anyone hurt my family knowingly”

“No point in worrying about it lets wait and see what the outcome is”

Not one adult vocalised their thoughts especially Shashi- but he felt it, Khushi reaction to Arnav, that Slap, her comments, there was a lot of unsaid words in that slap and Arnav famous for his anger and temper tantrums, didn’t say a word, he accepted it. A wronged man would have reacted instantaneously – Arnav was to slow responding, it was a while after that he galvanised into action to go after Khushi. There had to be unresolved business for him to settle and not from today. You didn’t need to be an astute businessperson to deduce that just a parent.

“Mum what’s wrong? Please talk to me?”

“Aarav, please don’t worry, you know what I did was wrong beta, I just lost the fight without even letting it begin.”

“Khushi we need to talk”

“Who let you in?”

“Uncle what you doing here? You got a death wish? after what mum just did to you?”

“Aarav would you mind if I spoke to your mum alone?”

“Depends on my mum …mum do you want to speak to uncle alone? Or should I ask him to go”

“Aarav you never ask a guest to leave, that’s not polite”

“Neither is slapping them, mum”

“That was in his own house, I promise I won’t do it here”

“You’re not going to fight or kill him are you? I want a mum to go back to the states with”

By now both mother and son were smiling at each other – the banter had relieved some of Khushi’s tension

“We will be going back together Aarav, don’t worry”

“Ok you two, be nice to each other and don’t break anything when I’m gone and I’ll be in soon to check on you two-I’d better find this room like I’m leaving it”.

Khushi smiled “yes mum” that’s what she always used to say to and his friends when she left them alone to play.

“Coffee Arnav ?”

“Something stronger if you have it ?”

Khushi pour Arnav a shot neat. “I’ll make myself some tea”

“I’d rather you didn’t, I remember the last time.” Arnav place a hand to his chest rubbing it remembering the pain.

“I won’t fling a good cup of tea at you”

“Shall we talk … and clear the air between us like it or not your sister is married to my brother, and we have nieces and nephews’ in common”

“Talk then” Khushi replied

“What was the slap for?”

“You had the audacity to suggest that I going to walk away from a project on a whim and leave things unfinished, that’s not me that’s you, I don’t leave with things half-finished you do. ”

“What you talking about … I complete my projects”

“So you admit it, I was a project!”

“Khushi what are you talking about? what project?”

“Y…y..you only wanted to get me into bed and then after you disappeared without a word”

“Whoa up there KHUSHI  KUMARI GUPTA what do you mean I only wanted to get you into bed ….. it was you …you chose to end it ….you left”

“I didn’t end it, you idiot … you did”

“Khushi watch the tone … and don’t call me an idiot….I didn’t end anything ….you vanished like a poof of smoke”

“You didn’t return my calls for three weeks, what was I to expect, I had a show down with my parents, imagine single, no potential husband in sight and pregnant”

“What do you mean pregnant?”

“What do you think pregnant means … I was carrying a child not any old child but your child …Aarav …he’s not something I found under the bushes or picked up from the local groceries store.”

“Aarav’s mine? I think I need another drink”

Arnav looked shocked at that statement and visibly paler.

“He’s 8 years old, who did you think was the father? I didn’t leave your bed and jump straight into someone else’s. What kind of girl do you think I am? leaving yours and before yours is barely cold, I’m in someone elses?”

“Aarav’s mine?”

“Yes , have you not heard anything, I have said”

“Aarav’s mine! Why have you not told me this before – How dare you keep my son apart from me. Why am I only finding about him now? Khushi all this time I had a child in this world and I didn’t know.”

“I KEPT YOU APART ?”

Khushi felt she was losing it, why did he look mad at her infact he was furious

“You never called after … you went away for 4 weeks and then after that I never heard I called you umpteen times for another 3 weeks I couldn’t wait any longer… I had to tell Babuji and Amaa and the rest is history.”

“Well it’s a history I have no knowledge about”

“I called you Arnav , I don’t know how many times you never answered”

“I WAS IN HOSPITAL UNCONSCIOUS AFTER SURGERY – how could I answer, I broke my leg after snowboarding and hit my head, you remember I was going on a snow boarding holiday with friends well they didn’t tell Nani or Di till I came round three weeks later and then Di flew over, it was another 4 weeks before I got back to Dehli and you were gone … no one was talking about you, I tried to call you umpteen times as you put it …a dead line. I tried to find out about you then I heard you had run away from home gone abroad with another man…..every time I saw Babuji he would clam up, Garima aunty and Payal were crying about the fact that you had left after a big fight. So, I didn’t just abandon you …I tried to find you and when I couldn’t, slowly I stopped looking for you and focussed on my business it was the only to survive without you. Then I grew into a habit of avoiding all information about you ….it was too painful… I wasn’t sure I could fix myself up again to function again so it was easier to block you out of my memories. It wasn’t until Akaash told me recently that you had made contact with her and you were planning to meet up that you had a son  as well. I thought 9 years …you had moved on. Then when I saw Aarav, I just assumed you had moved on very quickly.  Sorry for that …I should have known better.”

“Mum, Mum are you OK can I come in?” Aarav put his head through the office door

“Good uncle you’re alive” then he looked at his mum…She was crying.

In a flash, he was next to her wiping her tears- this was something new to him she only cried in India while in the states she had never cried here she seem to be crying all the time.

“Have you made mum cry …” Aarav stood infront of his mother with his arms by his side and fists clenched getting ready to take Arnav on.

“Aarav, I’m fine, she hugged him I need to talk to your …uncle for a bit longer …grown up  stuff, I’ll be out in a bit.

“He is a good boy”

“He is; I  didn’t ….I ….no one told me you were in an accident”

“Khushi what’s past is past there have been mistakes on both sides , there is no point in what if, if only the past is the past where do we go from here?”

“I don’t know”

“Khushi, there are no miracle fixes for us- I want to be there for my son; I have missed the first eight years of his life, I don’t want to miss any more. I want to be there at his next birthday, next Diwali, next Holi . I want to see him in his end of term school play. I want to be there for his little achievements and for his big.”

“Arnav he’s mine! You can’t have him”

“Khushi, I didn’t mean that for a minute. I want the world to he has a father and it’s me, he’s my son but not until he’s ready to handle and you’re ready to tell the world. I’m not asking you to move to Dehli. I am asking you for time and not to shut me out. I will come to the states every other weekend to build my relationship if that what it needs. Allow me slowly into your life, till Aarav is ready to accept me as a father. As for you and me we have history, and we still have chemistry. I’m not seeing anyone and I’m certain that you are not because you have not mentioned it. We can start with a date and see what happens – no pressure. We can tell the family or not this is purely your call and what is best for Aarav. And if that’s too much to digest in block break it down think about it and let me know. I will be as little or as much in your life as you want, and you don’t have to answer now – think about it at least”

“Aarav’s waiting outside ….I need to …”

“Time” Arnav replied

“I’ll leave you and give you time to think”

Arnav returned home to Shantivan to a waiting family and a Shashi Uncle.

“Well Arnav…please explain?”

“Uncle there’s nothing to explain, I was out of order at the meeting, and I deserved the slap- I’ve spoken to Khushi and we have resolved it and tomorrow’s a new day and if you will all excuse me I need to have a shower and dinner. Uncle if you want to discuss business I more than happy to after dinner and if you want to discuss the conversation, I have just had with Khushi and my apology, you had better have that conversation with Khushi”

“I’ll catch up on business matters tomorrow, for now I’m off to see my grandchild”

Over the remaining two weeks of that their holiday, Shashi saw the amount of time Arnav spent with Aarav and Khushi. But he also knew that Khushi had made it evidently clear that they were returning to New York ready for the new school year.

Epilogue  

Arnav’s frequent flyers miles rapidly built up over the year; Everyone in the family knew Arnav was flying over to meet Khushi but if anyone asked it was the American project. Khushi and Aarav spent all their breaks in India living with mum and dad.

It was evident by easter holidays that Arnav adored Aarav and vice versa the relationship between Arnav and Khushi was much harder to pin down it wasn’t until the summer break when it was accidently revealed at arti time at Shantivan.

The family were gathered in the mandir finishing the Arti when Arnav arrived home late, without a second thought he just went and stood next to Khushi and Aarav and had his hand on the Puja thali on top of Khushi’s fingers and the three completed the puja together.

It wasn’t until after all the children had gone to bed that nani took up the gauntlet and asked Arnav “ Chote is there something you would like to share with us, I ‘m not what surprised me more the fact that you were present for the Arti or that you were not standing next to Di but instead to Khushi?”

“Nani it’s simple, If I stand next to Khushi during arti and hold the thali its less likely to be a weapon aimed at my head”

“Arnav! That was an accident if you hadn’t surprised me, the thal wouldn’t have flown out of my hand”

“or landed on my head so you see Nani its safer for me to hold Khushi’s thal at arti time”

Arnav smiled at Khushi… gazing at her and returned to his family if you really must know Khushi and I have been dating each other and Aarav’s ok with that. They will be moving here to  Dehli after Halloween in time for a Diwali wedding. A SMALL INTIMATE FAMILY WEDDING – nani small being the operative word.

It had been almost a year a half before Khushi married Arnav since starting her journey.

And it wasn’t until just after new year that Khushi and Arav broke the news that they were going to have an addition to the family. Khushi had explained to Aarav in no uncertain terms that her and Arnav loved him and a new addition would not mean that they loved him any less. “Arnav is your real father, Aarav you will always have a special place in his heart, and he will never love you any less”

Aarav was so overwhelmed by the news that all he could do was hug and cry into Arnav’s shoulder and Arnav’s response was to join him.

As for the rest of the family when they were told about Aarav’s true parentage just smiled.. too much water had passed under the bridge, and it all come right in the end. Shashi uncle had commented he has my intelligence, and good looks, Arnav your habits and temper, and Khushi’s ability to make people happy. And by the way I figured out you were Aarav’s father when Khushi slapped you that day.


Arnav’s Thoughts

Arnav’s Thoughts

This is a old story , I don’t think I have had it on this site – part 5 of Khushi makes it will be up by next sunday …

Arnav’s Thoughts

Who would she be ?

She would come  like an explosion of colour

Disrupting each fragment of his black and white life

She would add shades to his perception

She would blend his corners

She  would diluted his anger

She  would melt his frozen heart

She would give him sight

She would make him smile

She would him laugh

She would restore his faithShe would be his soul mate  .

This is the opening to a 2/ part os story – contrary in terms just as Khushi and Arnav are –
How will he see things through her eyes?

“Chote ,  have  a safe trip and don’t forget we got Gupta uncles daughter staying with us for 4 weeks when you get back from scotland . Please behave when she is around , no tantrums or bad behavior.”Di ! Please stop parading these girls in front of me !”

“Arnav Singh Raizada ! Don’t think that you have grown so big that I can’t pull your ear or make you sit in a corner like a chicken”

Crap. He must have made Di really she called him by his full name. ” Sorry”

She is staying for 4 weeks if I thought she was a suitable match for you, she would not be staying here. She’s on holiday coming here for a show and a concert ok! “

“Love you Di “

“Bye Chote phone me when you arrive ok”

Khushi  carried her tea from the kitchen to the poolside and sat their quietly drinking with her back to the door. She sat in the shade of the tree so as not to get overheated .

She felt the draught of the door open strands of hair escaped and flew across her face .

“Who’s there ?”

“Arnav “

“Hi ,I’m sorry I’m invading your space ,its a very restful place -listen you can hear the birds . You cant hear that anywhere else “

“I know”

” Can i finish my tea before I leave you on your own “

She had heard the change in pace of his breathing , she could hear the tension in his words – after all she had invaded his space , she didn’t belong here . Di had said he would be arriving from London and would be tired.

“Oh sorry I forgot you have just arrived , can I ask OP to get you anything coffee ,snack or a sandwich ?”

She was stunningly breath-takingly beautiful he was completely lost in her. She was asking him if he wanted  a coffee or snack whose house was it? . Di and her plans !

“NO Thanks! I’m going to bed “

Khushi thought to herself – what happened that tone that underlying anger what had she done to upset him so .

“I’ve finished my tea. See you later “

“not if I can help it “muttered Arnav unbeknown to him heard by Khushi.

Dinner time Arnav came down to see everyone . He met and chatted with everyone and let them tell him all their news.

As they all sat down for dinner -” she ‘s not eating with us tonight “

For some unknown reason guilt raised its ugly head could she have possibly have heard ?- No , he buried it as quickly as the thought had surfaced.

It was the following day at breakfast she was laughing and making tea for everyone .She had her back to him “Arnav is that you ? What would you like tea ? coffee?”

“Neither !”

Obviously he wasn’t a morning person-or had he just got out on the wrong side of bed  ” Ok then its got to be juice”

She poured him a glass and held it out for him to take. Arnav didn’t take the drink

“Khushi Bitia Let me pass it to him “

“Still with a smile on her face anything else?”

“Please sit down only family serve !”

“Chote !”

Khushi laughed “Ok thats good then since I adopted you all as part of my ever growing family so is it toast for you then ?”

Arnav nodded stiffly

Dadi called out “he is saying yes Khushi Bitia. I think he must be jet lagged he is not normally so rude and don’t glare at me .I am your grandmother  “

She buttered the toast and passed it to Nani .

“Thanks – but i have to go “Arnav left hungry . He would grab something at work

“Nani did i do something wrong ?”

“No Khushi – he is just tired !”

“Thats ok nani  know I scare people they don’t know what to say to me “

Khushi came back late from rehearsals that evening everyone had already sat down for dinner and started.

“Hi All I’m starving i feel that my throat been cut from my stomach – I need food .”

“Khushi come and sit with me at the end and let me tell you what there is “

“No nani ji, let my stomach be tickled and cajoled by expectation of the different aromas emanating from the this table “

“Hi Arnav – still not speaking “

“I like to eat my dinner uninterrupted- thankyou . Can you pass me the kerala “

Khushi stretched her hand to the bowl in front of her she took a long fulfilling sniff of the food would you rather not have dal -it smells lovely – homemade dal with chilli and garlic tarka”

“No – if i wanted dal i would have asked for it -kerala please “

“Ahhh the magic word -let me see if i can reward you “

“She laughed and smelled the food  yup i think I will let you have this -as you said please “

Laughingly she passed him the bowl.

Khushi focused all her thoughts on her food . Arnav saw her serve herself and gobble the food down. She must have been really hungry.

Khushi finished dinner and helped Di and OP clear away the table. This was a more difficult task for her to complete but she completed it.

She made whipped coffee for everyone except Akash who had warm milk . She placed the mugs on a tray and brought them into the main area. As she came in Arnav noticed that Akash got up to  take the tray and pass it around. This annoyed him why was he helping – if anything it should have been Di ;was he interested in her? he would watch Akash.

The news items were being discussed and scrutinized and dissected. Khushi joined the debate and although she agreed with Arnav’s view point she argued just for fun. Everytime Arnav commented she put an opposing view. Annoyed with her Arnav got up and left announcing that he had work to finish.

Arnav sat by the poolside working  on his laptop. He couldn’t focus , he couldn’t concentrate every time he started her face swam in front of his eyes . Angrily he slammed down the lid of his lap top.

“Temper Temper !”

“What do you want ?”

“Nothing , just a truce – I don’t  even know why we are always arguing – I don’t with anyone else -it takes up to much energy better spent on other things “

Khushi walked up to Arnav and held out her hand . Arnav stood up to to shake it “Truce . Do you really believe that we should stop all child labour “

Khushi laughed and sat down. Arnav started discussing the pro and cons of child labour . They talked into the early hours of the morning. It was only when Khushi said “what time is it ?”

“Late – bedtime “

Arnav watched her sashay out of the room “See you at breakfast and try smiling “

Arnav lay in bed replaying the conversation she had valid arguments and backed it up ,he liked the way her hair fell across her face in the night breeze. He liked her ass it was cute especially -what the hell Arnav thought to himself that Di .He punched the pillow and focused on going to sleep.

At breakfast she was there before he was.He stared at her she did have cute ass – he really had to stop this train of thought.

“Morning Arnav what would you like ?”

“toast and juice please “

Breakfast was full of life and there was a lot of laughter at the table – how come he had never noticed this before – was there always silence when he had breakfast – he couldn’t remember .

He saw Akash running down the stairs “we are late Bhai the Shukar Bhai’s meeting has been brought forward we need to leave now “

“Akash not without breakfast “

“no Khushi we really have to go the meeting “

“Akash 10 minutes arguing with me and you know I will win or just have some breakfast which will take 5 mins”

Arnav didn’t like the banter between them ,the familiarity between them, the playfulness.

“Eat Akash she can argue for England this will be quicker “

Laughter erupted around the table.

Khushi had puri and aloo’s in her plate she got up and said sit here. Akash sat and Khushi said “open “

She place a niwala of aloo and puri into his mouth . “Chew quickly”

Laughter grew in volume round the table as Khushi fed Akash  timing each mouthful not allowing him to speak drink this see it took you less than 5 mins and we are all happy !”

“Khushi you are mad ! thankyou “

Khushi arched her face towards Akash turning her cheek to him inviting a kiss. Akash with no thought gave her a friendly peck on the cheek. ” Go now – hurry or you will be late and say its Khushi fault “

Conversation laughter carried on round the table as though this was normal , Arnav jaw clenched his hands curled into fists .

“Lets go Akash now ” Arnav thought ,was this normal no one batted an eyelid at what had  just occurred. no one commented not Nani or Mami. He must be losing the plot .

Di had said this girl was not for him . Why not ? Was she here for Akash? , for the first time in his life Arnav found himself being jealous of his brother . He actually liked Khushi. By evening his frustrations had grown, he had decided that he would have to find out what was going on in Akash’s brain .

He was sat in the evening having a cup of tea with the family , when his phone rang. By the end of his conversation his voice had grown in volume the room had fallen silent. He got up and briskly and strode across” Akash i need the Shukar brothers file “

What Arnav didn’t see was Khushi running into the house carrying a basket of flowers “Nani look what I bought ?”

CRASH- both bumped into each other Khushi fell landed hard on the floor banging her head Arnav tried to stop her from falling but instead landed on top of her . The basket landed on top of them and they were both showered in an abundance of flowers .

Everyone rushed over .

“Arnav get off me !”

“Can t you see where you are going ?”

“Get of me you idiot you’re heavy and my head hurts and my flowers “

Arnav rolled off her -Crap why was he so angry at her – it was an accident – was she hurt ? she said that her head hurt .

Before he could ask Akash was there stroking her head “are you ok ? Do you need any help ? “

Khushi sat up and rubbed the back of her head her hand felt wet she looked at her hand they all saw it. Red. She  didn’t see what they all saw..

Arnav scooped her up and placed her on the sofa “Call the doctor now Akash , Di towel  “

“I’m fine stop fussing all of you , I’ve done a lot worse this is nothing head wounds bleed a lot , how bad is the damage to my flowers ?”

“Flowers ? you’ve got blood pouring out of your head and you’re concerned about the flowers ! Unbelievable !”

She moved the compress and felt her head ” Ok its lumpy and sore but its not bleeding anymore so I don’t need a doctor – agreed .”

“Khushi are you sure your ok ?”

“Yeh I’m fine “

“Your eyes seem glazed “

“Honestly I’m fine”

“Bitia go to your room and rest “
“Nani ji I’m fine , I brought the flowers home to arrange them and I need some help, so I thought that either you or  Di could help me if thats ok “

“of course we’ll both help “

Arnav shook his head in disbelief she didn’t look right ,the doctor was on the way anyway he would check.

Op had picked up all the scattered flowers and petals but had missed two petals. As Khushi got up and walked towards the dining table she slipped on the petals . She screamed expected another hard landing, instead of putting her hands to break her fall she place them behind her head. It wouldn’t  take another kiss with the cold hard marble floor. Her face screwed up in pain expecting the worst.

But her head didn’t hit the floor she was caught in a pair of strong unyielding arms in a vice like grip. She felt his heat warm her his smell – it was Arnav’s smell He had saved her .

She slowly unscrewed her eyes and opened her emerald eyes and gazed unblikingly upwards.”Khushi you really need to look where you’re going.”

“I just needed an excuse to be held by a strong pair of hand ” Khushi pretended to feel his biceps

“Happy to oblige “

“Khushi ji I’m sorry I didn’t clean up properly are you ok  “

“HP I’m ok don’t worry .You going to let me go Arnav “

“What ? yes. Are you ok ?  “

Khushi was half way through constructing a flower ball when the doctor arrived.

“She’s in the dining area “

“Hi Khushi I’m Dr Mehtha I heard you had a pretty bad knock”

“nothing that a couple of paracetamols won’t cure “

“She is quite stubborn “

“No I’m not – forgive me I just don’t like Drs”

“Well since I’m here may I have a look? “

“Well  it doesn’t look that bad “

“I told him that – I know what a bad fall feels like “

“how long have you been blind ?”

She heard Arnav take a swift intake of breath – surely not how could he have not realized that she was blind .

“For as long as I can remember . I have been through the mill there are no miracle cures for me . I manage quite well normally I have Joe but I thought it was not fair to have him here for 3 /4 weeks so I have all of them acting as my eyes “

“well call me if you need me – she will be fine Arnav “

crap what had he said  could she not see where she was going .

“Arnav you know I have got an excellant hearing sense I can hear those cogs in your brain working overtime on comments you made – don’t worry I like to treated normally and in this house I am .”

“Khushi I ..I “

“Oh please don’t change, just carry on being your argumentative self and keep scowling “

“How do you know I’m am scowling ? You can ‘t see “

“But I can feel your scowl”

They both burst out laughing. I’ve finished my flower ball it feels good but you have to tell me what it looks like “

“Its beautiful Khushi “

Arnav replied ” in the words of someone more famous than me

“The taste of chili flakes, candy and heavy cream.

the smoothness of satin,

The pain of a burnt fingertip.

The warmth of a sunset.

The smell of roses and cinnamon.

The sound of a violin, playing a slow song.

The soothingness of warm water.

That’s the colour and look of your flower ball “

“Thankyou Arnav – that was described perfectly “

“I fancy a cup of tea does anyone want one ?”

“Yes please “

Arnav watched every move she made he watched how precise everything was in the kitchen and how she made the tea. Hey Arnav I’ve made your tea where do you want it – “poolside please I’ll be there in a minute  “

He watched Khushi carry two cups to the poolside . He changed and came in while she was sipping her tea .

“Had a shower ?”

“How do you know that ?”

“the smell of sea spray – you always smell of it in the mornings “.

“Your tea – I hope its not cold “

“Are you coming to my concert ?”

“Do I have a choice ?”

“Not if I know Di “

“I will be  coming” 

” Did you sort your meeting out with the Shukar bros?”

Arnav went on to explain his thoughts about the bros ,his concerns about doing business with them – but I need a reason to justify my decision “

“I’m tired Arnav and My head is beginning to throb so I am going to turn in  and since when does Arnav need to justify any decision -follow your gut -say No! anyone asks questions say you’re Arnav singh Raizada !”

Khushi dressed for the concert  she had an emerald green dress on with thin spagetti straps and a split up her dress that felt it hid nothing. She felt more exposed than covered. She didn’t feel comfortable  she didn’t like the fabric. She hated the dress. Who could she ask ?At this late stage what else could she wear ?

“Di Di Nani where are you ? ” she came out of her room and started coming down the stairs and a  hush descended in the lounge the guys looked till their eyes almost popped out.  Nani found her voice “Whats the matter Khushi Bitia “

“Nani ji, its this dress they have sent me i feel i have nothing on tell me what you think ?

“You look stunning Bitia but i think your dress reveals more than it conceals”

“Nani Ji I feel like I am being sold what can I wear that is green ?”

” Khushi I have new stock upstairs i have a sari that would look perfect on you if you trust me “

Upstairs in his room – do you trust me then go put this choli and petticoat on in the bathroon and I will drape your sari you will look perfect .

Khushi you looked stunning earlier but thats how only your husband should see you . You oozed sexuality in that dress . In this you will do exactly the same but leave a lot more to the imagination. There you’re done shall we go your carriage awaits me lady.

They came down stairs ,Khushi on arnav’s arm. They looked out of this world perfect made for each other .

He looked at her , she looked straight ahead.

“Nani ji what do you think of my plan isn’t she perfect for him. We will ask him tomorrow. Did you see how quickly he took her up to change – he is very possessive, she is only his and no one else’s to see. How long before he realizes that we asked her here for him. Shashi Uncle says yes to the rishta if Khushi agrees.”

Part ii epilogue

Three and half years later

Khushi sat in the poolside next to Joe. It was usually Joe that she discussed her problems , he was her sounding board , constant companion.

Joe always knew when his mistress had problems he nuzzled his head in her lap trying to offer her some comfort.

Joe what am I going to do? I am used to this I have never known anything difference. Me myself I, I manage with you and Arnav. Neither of you let me get into any kind of trouble. I have you both to help guide me but this. I don’t think i can manage this by myself.

“What can’t you manage by yourself?”

He walked across and kissed her on her lips. “In the time i have known you, that word hasn’t existed in your dictionary “

Khushi ran her fingers over his face stopping to caress his lips – he patiently waited what was she looking for ? what was she worrying about ? She must be really worried to be seeing his face this way, had someone said something to her ? There was nothing in the gossip columns about him -there had been nothing since she had come into his life -he was no longer news worthy since he was completely and totally obsessed with his wife.

Khushi come here, she heard him patting his thighs as he sat down she slid across and placed her arms around his neck and buried her face in his shoulder.

He felt the warm wetness through his shirt ,silent sobs racked her body.

What the hell had happened today ? The famous Raizada temper was rising, Khushi felt all his muscles tense like a tiger ready to pounce. “Khushi please stop and explain -I’m not like you, I am crap at reading people just tell me what is wrong and I’ll fix it, if i have done something wrong i will try and fix it, if someone has said something to you or done something to you I will probably kill them “

HP chose that moment to bring Arnav ‘s tea in and started sputtering his apology when he saw his bhabi in his Bhaiya’s lap “Maaf keri yeh Bhaiya (I am sorry Bhaiya ) He quickly placed the tea down and scurried out the room as though he was on fire.

Anjali caught HP running away back to the kitchen “HP what’s wrong ?” HP explained the senario that he had just experienced but “Anjali Di , if bhaiya or bha ..bha .. are ..are doing …anything …that I shouldn’t see, Joe always barks and stops me- that’s how I know – but Anjali Di, I think Khushi Bhabhi was crying !”

In all the time Anjali had known Khushi she had only cried a handful of times “Chote !” “Chote !”.

Arnav thought what was this place like, sometimes it was worse than the traffic at the Dehli interchange. “Di a minute I’m coming “

What should he sort out first sister or wife ? He picked up his phone “Di is it urgent ?”

“Why have you made Khushi cry ?”

“What – I made Khushi cry “

“Khushi I am really sorry i don’t know what i have done please tell me what did i do ?”

Khushi gave him a weak watery smile and indicated for the phone “Di your Chote did nothing  I just need to work out something and I will tell you later -OK”

“Arnav you have done nothing – well that’s not exactly true you are partly to blame”

“What ?- ok Khushi what have i done -i can’t stand your tears “

“Are you sitting down ?”

“Really Khushi ?In case you haven’t  noticed you are sitting in my lap”

“Ok I know this conversation is going to be all screwed up but here goes – I’m blind I have been as long as far as i can remember “

“10 out of 10 – your blind yet you can see more than most people so that’s a null and void statement “

“Arnav you’re biased – i have had too work twice as hard as anyone to get where I am today “

“That’s the norm for you so that statement doesn’t hold water with me!”

“What you take for granted I can’t see  the changing colours of the sun rising – but that doesn’t worry me be cause I have people like you to tell me what I can’t see remember you said it was like melted butter and strawberry swirling in a pot of cold blue”

“Khushi I don’t know where this conversation is leading to ?”

“Arnav I’m pregnant -“

Khushi and she was enveloped in a huge hug and followed by a passionate kiss his mouth and tongue and hands communicating his happiness to her then all of a sudden he stopped -“Whats wrong with you or the baby ?”

“Nothing “

“Neither you or the baby ?”

“No we are both fine – the baby is at risk from me !”

“What ?”

“Arnav I ‘m blind  how am i going to see if he or she  is in trouble , needs help , what if he or she falls where will i find him or her. The smallest task , the simplest thing looking after my baby how will I manage ?”

“Is that what all these tears are about ?– Khushi you have always managed and we will , you will.”

“A baby – finally I never thought it would happen – I don’t know I just wasn’t expecting it. Why all our bits function, this should have happened a long time ago”

“errr I was on the pill and still am !”

“Sooo what’s meant to be is meant to be – accidents happen- and this is a good one ! Khushi do you know I want minimum of three or four or five children.”

“Yeh while you’re not having them or carrying them let’s make it a half dozen !”

“Good idea – so glad you agree”

“Shut up Arnav and finish what you started !” grabbing his collar and pulling his face towards her.

“I thought I already had -you’re having a baby “

Khushi grabbed his collar and pulled his lips towards her “Kiss me properly!”

The real unspoken question was never voiced – that would wait -there was nothing she could do any way. Would her child be able to see . Please Devi Maya let her child be perfect- don’t make it harder for them than it had to be.

4 years and approximately 2 months after her wedding

She hadn’t been keeping well the last few days , her back was constantly aching. She sat on her bed trying to get comfortable the baby wasn’t due for another 4 weeks – God how she wished the 4 weeks were over..

She remembered Arnav introducing her soon after they had got married -someone had whispered she can’t see , he could have done better. She flinched ,he felt it, he heard it and he sorted it . He pointed out that she saw more than most ,the person underneath where most stopped at the surface she found the real person hidden away underneath and thats who she saw their true self. He knew he wasn’t worth her but he would try his damnedest to be. Later when Khushi wasn’t there he sent a message out in no uncertain terms that they would not be attending any events or functions that were attended or supported by the likes of Mrs Mehra .

Everyone got the message very quickly if you wanted to do business with ASR never say anything derogatory about his wife or make any kind of comment about her. She was strictly off limits to everyone.

Pain seared through Khushi , Joe ‘s ear’s pricked up and he came up to her. Khushi got up off her bed to reach the the phone and a second searing painripped through her body and she passed out on the floor.

Joe came up to her and nudged her and nudged her and then turned and ran down to the breakfast table.

Looking around , he spied Arnav about to close the door and barked .

Unbelieveable now he had to say bye to Joe as well! “Bye Joe “

Everyone at the breakfast table laughed how he had changed since Khushi had come into his life 4 years ago here he was saying bye to a dog .

the set of events that followed left everyone speechles. Joe growled bared his teeth and grabbed Arnav’s trousers pulling him back in the house .

” Stop Joe , Let go “

Arnav bent down and looked at Joe looked into his eyes and and whispered “Khushi”

Joe stopped growling and whined “Lead the way Joe quickly “

Joe raced ahead, closely followed by Arnav and then the rest of the family who by now had realized that this peculiar behavior of Joe could only be down to Khushi being in trouble.

The next 3 hours that followed were the longest that Arnav and Joe had to live through. The ICU team had done their best the babies were safe and in incubators 4 weeks early – two heart beats beating in unison and one larger child hiding the other one directly behind had gone unnoticed. Khushi had suffered sever blood loss but condition was stable but unconscious. Two days later out of ICU and on the road to recovery Khushi was introduced to her babies both boys -both perfect .

Khushi looked up at Arnav and whispered the question that hung in her mind unsaid “can they see?”

Khushi they are perfect in everyway they are responding to all tests as they should.

The floodgates opened “Thankyou Devi Maya for them “

No Khushi I thank her for all of you

– for allowing me the privileged of seeing the world through your eyes

you came like an explosion of colour

Disrupting each fragment of my black and white life

You added shades to my  perception

You  blended my  corners, edges 

You  diluted my  anger

You melted my heart

You gave me sight

You  made me smile

You  made me laugh

You restored my faith

 You are my  heart

You complete me

And when I think You can give me no more ,

You do exactly that.

Thankyou Khushi